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Posted on 31 Mar 2023

For Autism Acceptance Week, we’re sharing Tom Hewitt’s story who was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome (now known as autism) at 18 and who was supported by the Trust’s Neurodevelopmental Specialist Service. He talks about his experiences growing up, being classed as 'the weird kid' at school, his struggles with social interactions and how he found it hard to fit in.

Tom, 32 now works at the Trust as an IT Service Desk Analyst and says since day one, the Trust has welcomed and accepted him into the organisation, and he feels proud that he works for a company that looks after and respects its employees like him.

Tom's story:

“I didn’t get diagnosed with autism until I was 18 under the Nottingham City Autism Service which is now the Neurodevelopmental Specialist Service run by the Trust. Before my diagnosis, autism felt normal to me, because I never knew it even existed. It was only by chance when my dad found a leaflet at my local GP about autism, that I understood more about myself. It was like pieces had been missing in puzzle and it was all starting to come together and make sense.

“Growing up, my parents did all they could to encourage me. However, I felt like my life had no purpose and my prospects were limited. I never believed that I could go to university, and I was stuck in a vicious circle of sitting in my bedroom and doing nothing other than going to work in my then current retail job.

“I barely had any social interactions with others, and if I did with the people I called ‘friends’, it never felt right and comfortable for me, because I found it hard to fit in and enjoy others company. At school, I was always classed as the ‘weird kid’ who nobody wanted to talk to, and if they did, it was to make fun of or belittle me to the point where my confidence was extremely low.”

Autism has and continues to affect Tom in various ways, and it is often a daily struggle for him to keep his anxieties in order. He was also diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder, (GAD) seven years ago. GAD is long-term condition that causes a person to feel anxious about a wide range of situations and issues, rather than one specific event.

“The challenges I face most days is my constant anxiety and inability to relax which takes its toll on me both mentally and physically. I find everyday conversations alien and being in environments that make me feel both panicky and uncomfortable. As soon as I manage to solve one anxious thought, another may appear around a different issue, which in turn becomes a vicious circle of worry.

“Despite the difficulties I face on a regular basis, I find that autism has been a blessing in some ways, and I’ve learnt to accept and embrace both the negative and positive impacts it has on my life. I may struggle with everyday tasks that many of us would find normal and easy, such as cooking, routines, cleaning and DIY, but I learn more about myself every day, and I am proud of who I am. I enjoy helping others and working in an environment where I feel valued and respected like the NHS, and I am a firm believer in giving back for all I’ve received.

“My colleagues I work with have been very supportive in my current IT role and I appreciate all the guidance and knowledge they’ve shared with me. I can quite honestly say that I look forward coming to work, knowing that the support is there if I need it.

“For the future, my goal is to climb up the ladder in IT and pursue a career in Systems or IT training, or work in the Communications sector.

“To those out there who are on or know a person on the spectrum; please try to be considerate and patient with us. We may take a bit longer to process our thoughts and emotions and struggle with things you find easy to do, but to us in theory, we find them challenging. Be proud of who you are, and never let anyone tell you that you can’t succeed in life. Remember: autism is a blessing, not a burden, so embrace being different and go out there and be you.

For more information on the Trust’s Neurodevelopmental Special Service visit: https://www.nottinghamshirehealthcare.nhs.uk/neurodevelopmental-specialist-service

You can read Tom’s full story on the Trust’s blog: http://on-our-mind-notts.blogspot.com/2023/03/autism-acceptance-week-i-was-always.html